Wednesday, April 13, 2005

This is what happens when you're engine clueless

This is what happens when two 'engine-clueless' girls had a car breakdown on the highway.

1ST GIRL: Uh-Oh... something is blinking. SOMETHING IS BLINKING!!

2ND GIRL: What? What's blinking?!!

1ST GIRL: I dunno. There's this symbol that looks like a dripping kettle suddenly blinked.

2ND GIRL: A kettle? What do you mean a kettle? (Looks over to the driver's dashboard) Oh... you mean the one that looks like Aladdin's lamp.

1ST GIRL: Yeah... whatever. Look I'm gonna pull over and call my dad. (Pulled over to the side and immediately called Dad. Still mentioned that the 'kettle dripping' symbol was blinking. 2ND GIRL decided to call her boyfriend. She told him that the 'Aladdin's lamp' symbol was blinking.)

1ST GIRL: My dad says maybe we should just add water. DO you have water? (2ND GIRL hands her the mineral water. After water was added they set off again.) Phew! Thank God. The symbol's gone. (After a short while on the road...) Oh no!! It started blinking again!! (Immediately called Dad again and again mentioned that the Kettle dripping symbol was blinking.) Shriek! Oh no! It's no longer blinking. Now it's permanantly on!!! There's another symbol next to it and I don't even know what the hell it stands for. (Starts to panic nad yelled frantically at her dad on the phone. 2ND GIRL tries to recover from the ear piercing shriek.)

2ND GIRL: Cool it... calm down. You're driving, remember? Maybe we whould stop at the next petrol station.

1ST GIRL: I dunno whether we can make it. I'm gonna stop at the next Toll booth.

2ND GIRL: Yeah... that's cool. The next one is 5km away.

1ST GIRL: WHAT!!?? I don't think we can make it. What if the car dies?? (hands tight on wheels)

2ND GIRL: It won't (Prayed hard that the car won't die. Too broke to contribute to the repair costs.)

1ST GIRL: Hey, can you hear that? there's that sort of ticking sound.

2ND GIRL: Ticking? Oh... you mean the rattling sound? Yeah... where did it come from?

1ST GIRL: The ticking seems to be coming from the engine. Oh No! Oh No! (starts to panic again)

2ND GIRL: Just keep cool ok. (Sweating heavily) Just keep driving till we come to the nearest Toll booth. If you think the sound is getting worse let's just stop at the nearest phone at the side.

1ST GIRL: I'm NOT stopping at the side. A lorry might ram into us. They're all going so fast!

2ND GIRL: OH-KAY... we'll stop at the toll booth then. (Starts biting nails. 1ST GIRL still frantically having panicky conversations with dad.)

1ST GIRL: Look there's junction for a Toll booth. Let's go. Shit... where's my money? And why is this car swaying. Hmm... maybe there's strong winds. (stops at the side. Rummaged for money in handbag.) I wonder how much the toll is? Oh yeah... If I don't have enough money could you help out?

2ND GIRL: (GULP) Sure. No problem.

1ST GIRL: Okey... thank God! (Starts towards the toll booth when suddenly the engine stops just a few feet away from the toll booth.) Uh-Oh!

2ND GIRL: What's wrong now? Why did you stop? Is the engine dead? Can you start the engine?

1ST GIRL: Oh no! The engine is dead!! I can't even start the car!! And we were so close!!

After that... of course all the vultures (tow trucks) swarmed. 1ST GIRL picked one and they were taken to the nearest mechanic which was just opposite the toll booth. 1ST GIRL had to pay the tow truck RM20.

1ST GIRL: We were so close... if only the engine didn't die too soon and I would've saved 20 bucks.

The problem was that the main bearing was burned down. Typical problem for the type of car she was driving. The repairs would cost thousands-according to the mechanic (which the dad seriously doubt). When the 1ST GIRL was questioned she repeatedly said the 'kettle-dripping' symbol blinked, which of course made the mechanics laughed. And when she mentioned that strong wind made her car swerve they laughed again. Apparently that was a normal condition if the main bearing was busted. So 1ST GIRL decided to shut up and only answer when she really have to. 2ND GIRL thanked god that she didn't say anything or she would've looked like a fool too.

Moral of the story... try to find out the names of the symbols on the dashboard and what they're for so that you won't make a fool of yourself at the mechanics.

And may be you've guessed it... 2ND GIRL was me.

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