Friday, April 14, 2006

Woes on mothers

Sometimes you just cant help but hate your own mom. And you just cant help but wonder whether you're in the right family or were you switched at birth. The two of you just can't get any more different.

Why do mothers do things to aggravate you? (Actually they might ask the same things from their daughters). But I think I can safely say that most mothers don't really try to understand thair daughters and daughters no matter how much they try will never understand their mothers. There's simply too much of an age difference. Sure you see these moms that get along so well with their moms but I betcha that those moms are probably much younger than the moms that usually have a bad relationship with their kids. Moms of the later age just cant understand what teens or young adults nowadays go through in their life. They're so trapped in that old mindset where moms and dads are the authority and nothing the kids say would change their minds about anything.

I see this a lot in Asian household. Asian parents are famous for beating the kids up, for not listening to what the kids say and using the iron claw treatment on their kids. And I see it most often in Asian mothers. Why? Just because they themselves were brought up that way and they just can't help turning out like their moms. It's just a shame when I see bright and intelligent kids trying to voice out some stuff to be instantly rebuked by the parents just with the excuse that they're kids and they dont know any better. How would you know that the kid didn't know any better? Kids nowadays are growing up faster and faster every day. Things aren't the same during the time when our parents were growing up. I think most kids nowadays just want to be heard. Parents dont hafta do what their kids say just listen and discuss it with them. Is that so hard to do?

Parents think that by listening to their kids its like demeaning themselves. Relinquishing whatever veto power they have and sharing it with the kids. Hell NO! Sides, parents aren't supposed to have veto powers anyways. How are you supposed to teach kids to be fair and accepting of other people's ideas if you dont set an example at home. Kids are not dumb not if you teach them right. They know that sometimes parent do the things that they do because it's the best course of action but if things are done just because that what the parents say then for sure the kids will revolt. I believe that parents should let kids take their time in doing some things. Dont force or imply rules just because that is what you believe in. In the end parents are gonna suffer coz their kids went against them behind their backs.

I've seen parents who are democratic and fair and trust me their kids are far better off than most parents who uses the ironclaw method. It's just aint worth it. You dont want your kids to turn your backs on you. Listen to them once in a while and you might learn something about your kids. Sometimes they can be far more intelligent than you give credit for.

try it... It's not so hard to listen.

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