If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

Talk about a university that truly rolls with the times. If you can't stop teens from having sex then make them have safe sex. A complete 180 from what my previous university believed in. I think I'll really like it here :P

And IIUM shall be proud...

Remember the entry 'Be my Guess?'. I'm 'guest'-ing that entry really cracked most of you up. And since I have been in desperate need of cheering up of late, I've decided to share more funny liners that my friends and I have spotted throughout IIUM during our study years. If IIUM were to find out about this post I'll probably be in deep sh*t.

But what the heck. Onwards with the funnies!

Taken from a 'Go Green' poster

This is neither British nor American spelling. Please note wriggly red line whenever you type something. It's wriggly & red for a reason.

Taken from IIUM PC Fair

"Promote! Promote! 1 day only. If you don't come now I cannot promote you. "

(Also note that 's' has somehow disappeared from 'unit'. Ashamed to be in the same poster as 'special promote' perhaps?)

Taken from an IIUM Bazaar

The word makan in inverted commas suggests so many different meanings for those with the "imaginative" minds. Give a teen an opportunity and they'll amaze you with his/her perverseness.

Taken from an ad in IIUM

Never mind all the grammatical mistakes. Concentrate on "Are you 'in' Harry?" *LoL* I told you, give any opportunity for perverseness and it shall happen.

Taken from a poster in IIUM

Anybody care to sign up? Tools needed for the workshop: long trench coat, dark sunglasses, cap and running shoes.

Taken from a 'Maintain Cleanliness' poster in IIUM

Decoy (taken from Oxford Dictionary):

1. a bird or mammal, or an imitation of one, used to lure game.

2. a person or thing used to mislead or lure someone into a trap.

3. a pond from which narrow netted channels lead, into which wild duck may be enticed for capture.

So are we supposed to use a bird/ mammal to clean as we go? Or mislead someone when we want to clean? Or perhaps jump into a pond full of ducks after we clean? Hmmm...

Taken from a sign at one of the IIUM cafetarias

To check if you are a male, you must ensure that you have extra hanging appendages in between your crotch. If in doubt please do not hesitate to ask the nearest persons next to you. If in further doubt please go to the nearest administration office and drop your pants for further clarification.

So there you go folks. Hope you all had a good laugh. And please don't hesitate to point out further funny liners if ever you see one. We all could always do with a good laugh or two :)

*pics courtesy of Zetty Amny. She and I had plenty of good laughs over these few pictures .*

Now why didn't I think of that?

Now I know how to kill time when my mum drags me shopping :P

Be my Guess.

Can you spot what is wrong with this picture?

And to think this came from a local International university that prides itself on its English. Hampeh!

Sex Explained By Pens

I got this from Buzzfeed.com and it had me laughing my head off. And since laughter is the best medicine for pretty much anything, I thought I'd share it with you lovely people. Enjoy :D

Pederasty or paederasty (US: /ˈpɛdəræsti/, UK: /ˈpiːdəræsti/) is a (usually erotic) relationship between an older man and an adolescent boy outside his immediate family.

*I had to google this because I had no clue what it meant. Buat malu je jadi cikgu bahasa omputih.

An Awesome Reply From CEO Of J.P. Morgan To A Pretty Girl Seeking A Rich Husband!

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?

Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden ( ? ) , $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:

1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)

2) Which age group should I target?

3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.

4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

An awesome reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.

My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money" : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.

Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position". If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a ****; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich ****.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me.

signed,

J.P. Morgan CEO

(Resource: khairul@weezer.org)

Blogger's Note: Well there you go girls. Looks aint everything you know ;)